Received an invitation on FB for my high school reunion.
Wednesday, August 19, 2009
Odometer 17332 Mi Temp 80 F 9:24 PM "Has it been 10 yrs?"
I thought to myself: Has it really been 10 yrs since I walked out of doors at BEHS?! I think about all these classmates and what they're doing now. But more importantly, I think about me. What have I accomplished this past 10 yrs?
School? Ok. Done.
Career? Sightly but mostly stalled.
Love? I'm still looking for her, but she isnt' looking back.
Family of my own? No, see above but someday.
So when I into those reunions doors, what am I going to say?
Me: Hi! good to see you!
CM: What have you been up to?
Me: Not much. Just working and living.
CM: Oh good. I'm glad. Good to see you.
Me: You too.
End
Well, at least it'll be quick exit. See you at 2o years!
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
Odometer 17332 Mi Temp 80 F 8:39 PM "Feedback"
So I'm great at giving feedback, to friends, to folks at work, or to people in general.
Not to brag about myself (which in self is a rare feat) but I think I make a pretty good manager. I delegate well and take personal involvement and pride to make sure folks that I managed get to their careers goals.
But I'm lousy at receiving feedback.
So what does that say about me when not one but several folks tells me, in not so many words, on various occasions that as person, that I'm stiff and uptight, and that I'm way too intense? I don't response well to it because truth is they're absolutely right. I am uptight, and I put 200% into my work, even when it's unnecessary. I can't/don't know how to stop. and even when I let my guard down on rare incident, I immediately regret it or get into trouble. So I stop. I keep my guard up and hope things will naturally evolve.
I know I'm being unreasonable to myself. My friends tell me to just let go and do something random, meet people outside of work, and I even convinced myself I should. I just can't muster the strength to do it.
I guess acknowledging it is a good step to self realization...baby steps...
Not to brag about myself (which in self is a rare feat) but I think I make a pretty good manager. I delegate well and take personal involvement and pride to make sure folks that I managed get to their careers goals.
But I'm lousy at receiving feedback.
So what does that say about me when not one but several folks tells me, in not so many words, on various occasions that as person, that I'm stiff and uptight, and that I'm way too intense? I don't response well to it because truth is they're absolutely right. I am uptight, and I put 200% into my work, even when it's unnecessary. I can't/don't know how to stop. and even when I let my guard down on rare incident, I immediately regret it or get into trouble. So I stop. I keep my guard up and hope things will naturally evolve.
I know I'm being unreasonable to myself. My friends tell me to just let go and do something random, meet people outside of work, and I even convinced myself I should. I just can't muster the strength to do it.
I guess acknowledging it is a good step to self realization...baby steps...
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